


Tangled Tangerines

by Milfluvr69



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Hair Braiding, M/M, Mutual Pining, Two paragraphs making fun of teenage Hubert, bad banter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-02
Updated: 2019-09-02
Packaged: 2020-10-05 09:00:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,373
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20486270
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Milfluvr69/pseuds/Milfluvr69
Summary: Ferdinand has grown his hair out to an unpractical length. Which makes it entirely reasonable for Hubert to take matters into his own hands and make sure no one will take tactical advantage of the long locks. Any offer to braid the cavaliers hair is therefor completely and logically justified.





	Tangled Tangerines

He had been made aware on many occasions, of the impact of aesthetics. Growing up he had not properly valued the aspect of presentation. Hubert had more important things to think about than his personal appearance. At least... this was how he had justified his opinions to himself. In hindsight it was somewhat painful to think about how he’d allowed himself to look. 

The grease heavy curtain of black hair had not been making him appear menacing, as much as it has kept his skin oily and irritated. His lips were tinged white by how chapped they were, and yet he continued to bite on the dead skin and would often be bleeding. There was no aura of mystique to his half hidden face, only an awkward teen hiding away his unrefined features. Eyes would be following him despite his best efforts, often in disgust and pity from the more conventionally attractive students. Apparently you get noticed if you look… 

(“ You get noticed if you’re ugly Hubie, and you’re making yourself look a hot mess.” Dorothea had been bled dry of patience that day, crossing her hands as her lips drew upwards in a mocking smile. His futile resistance consisted of bringing up more important daily routines than grooming. Dorothea’s responsive laugh held no humor. “Oh absolutely, You don’t have any time to take and apply to your terrible appearance. No one else here is any kind of busy with assignments, or tending to their liege! Honestly? When was the last time you scrubbed your skin or cleaned your nails? Heaven's sake Hubie, when was the last time you washed your hair properly?”)

… Unkempt.

For Lady Edlegards sake, as well as for his own pride he did take the pointed advice to heart. It didn’t look good to put no effort into his maintenance when his Emperor looked so pristine. If Edlegard was new snowfall on a dangerous mountain peak, it would be no good to have him look like… well. Like a plagued ridden teen.

Buying a bulk of beauty products at his next visit to the market, Hubert sat down to dedicate himself to the art of cosmetics. Seeking out Dorotheas advice, he wrote down everything she had to share. She was more than eager to help clean up his act, enthusiasm for his potential almost having him flattered. And if he sensored her insults and wrote snarky comments of his own she never needed to know. Of course he applied the advice differently to himself. He was not about to pick up fashion tips from any of his peers, but he could acknowledge their specific strengths, even those of beauty.

There were practical points to the grooming as well. Watching Petras braids keep her hair away from her face, Dorotheas ridiculous hat have the same function, even Lindhards little bow seemed a help. It made him think of Edelgard, and how her long hair was only held back by two small ribbons. Not a very sensible hairstyle to maintain in battle. The power of habit also seemed to make the routines subconscious, and he decided he’d like to implement it as soon as possible. 

Hubert never did anything halfheartedly.

Approaching Edelgard, asking to care for her hair so it wouldn’t be in the way for battle was an interesting encounter that his Lady still found a humorous development. Mirth had softened her eyes in a way that rarely happened, and she had accepted his concerns graciously. Through the years his long thin fingers got more skilled at braiding and styling the Emperor's hair. The practical and beautiful hairstyle she was adorned with during battle was Huberts craft at its finest. In the quiet moments of dawn when they exchanged greetings he would take his place behind her and prepare for the new day. A quiet shared routine that put both of them at ease. His coffee filling the room with its rich aroma, they were moments he had come to treasure.

Beneficial development were however not limited in his ability to help others. The years of dedication to the improvement of his appearance had yielded worthwhile results. No longer was he bothered by rashes and pimples covering his face like magma crusted craters on a sickly pale moon. Still shy of sunlight, his skin was now with a crisp glow that seemed more like that of a noble woman rather than that of a ghoul. His previously wax adjacent hair was trimmed monthly and washed every other day. Chapstick was regularly and generously applied and nails were meticulously manicured. Looking into a mirror he was pleased to see the reflection of a strikingly pristine and angular man, not a sickly kid crippled by puberty. By no means conventionally attractive, he was at the very least not out of place at standing on his Lady’s right hand side. 

That is, if your eyes did not stray to compare him to the man flanking her left.

Ferdinand had time treat him like a favored lover. His long locks falling like a waterfall lit by a gentle sunset. A soft breeze always seemed to catch the curls like he had the wind itself at his call. His cheeks constantly giving of a healthy, rosy glow. His easy smile showing of rows of pearly white teeth that inspired good humour in all those who saw it. Any fat that had covered his features in their academy days had long been honed away, showing a handsome chin. If makeup was applied it was with a surprisingly subtle touch, framing his gentle eyes and forcing you to meet his emotive gaze.

If the sun itself had taken the shape of a man he would not have outshined Ferdinand.

Hubert was of course, completely objective in his assessment of the Prime Minister.

Not that he would ever be blinded by something as trivial as physical beauty. Few people he had meet held a candle to the untouchable grace of The Emperor anyways. Not to mention that he’d be the first to acknowledge the character flaws Ferdinand had ingrained into his concerningly straight spine. 

The cavalier was loud. His posturing was ridiculous and his fashion flamboyish. While he had cooled down considerably in his attempts to be better than Edelgard in every possible way, his childish competitive streak had not died down. Ferdinand was a better loser ( and winner) than he had been during their school days, but had not stopped pestering his peers to entertain his already eclipsing ego. The man seemed to live on a diet of personal improvement, approval from his friends and annoying Hubert into spending tea time with him.

Not that he truly minded having focus of a man who dedicated every breath he took and every movement he made to what he cared about. No, overwhelmed would be a better word to describe why he kept staring at Ferdinand whenever he was approached by the younger man with an endless stream of questions. Somehow Hubert always found himself agreeing to spend more of his precious free time amusing the knight as his personal tragedian court jester.

They shared most of their lunches in the imperial gardens. An ideal atmosphere for the noble man, Ferdinand seemed to relax the instant he sat down on his chair. The bird chatter seemed more melodious, the flowers seemed scented stronger and the wind never dared to disturb the documents on the table. Put into such a serene scene Hubert felt he was more malplaced than Caspar in a ceramics store.

Reading through their reports in silence, Hubert dared steal a glance at the bachelor across from him. A gloved hand resting comfortably against the delicate handle on his porcelain teacup. Slow and rhythmic lifts of the brew to his lips, pacing himself to the internal, concise clock of noble politeness. 

Engaging in comfortable silence was something Hubert had not thought the pair would ever be able to accomplish. It made him smile now, to think of the intense disgust he felt seeing the beacon of orange that followed Edelgard with and unrelenting and unwelcome determination. Rival. The term hardly fit their relationship, no, Ferdinand was more a champion of any unpresent opposition giving a fresh perspective too every debate. A far cry from the contrarian of their youth, he now made constructive conversation and good points. The development was hard not to admire, and Hubert felt his lips draw upwards appreciatively at the memories.

“ May I ask what have you smiling so? It’s rare to see unconscious mirth soften your features.” Hubert scoffed at Ferdinand's amusement at his expense. There was no malice between them anymore, just teasing remarks that came from intimate friendship. 

“Seems I have remembered one of numerous occasions where you’ve publicly made a fool of yourself. Such memories never fails to put me in a good mood.” Far from a lie, but not exactly a truth. Well groomed eyebrows peaked upwards in surprise before a small laugh accompanied a shake of his head. A small avalanche of orange escaped over Ferdinands shoulder. The mage ached to tuck the loose locks behind his companions ear.

“ Pray then, be more specific, if the instances are so hard to keep count off.” Hubert had not managed to steal Ferdinand’s gaze from the paper he was reading on the different agricultural benefits of growing local vs. imported species of vegetables.

“ I was simply thinking of your ridiculous hair. You truly wear your vanity like a cape.” A small twitch of Ferdinand’s lips. Hubert felt it echoed in his own. 

“ Jealousy isn't a becoming look on you dear friend,” was the singsong response he got from behind the fifth page. Hubert had read that fifth page. He knew the words “Soil benefits” to be written fourteen times, and as this point was simply trying to save Ferdinands sanity. Their tasks were important, but that did not made all their work exciting. 

“ I will hardly entertain that concept, I will in fact entirely ignore it. Instead I will point out that its quite impractical of you. Why do you think Her Majesty wears her hair like she does? She quickly realized that It’s a tactical disadvantage to have hair loose at that length. Someone could grab it and quite easily drag you down from your high horse, and this time I do mean it literally.” 

Ferdinand let out his pearly sounding laugh. He had been trained from a young age to have a beautiful and clear laughter, after he had been heard snorting in between his merriment. He’d come clean on having to practice laughing properly during his speech lessons, as to not shame his father. Hubert in his malicious youth had always found it rehearsed and refined too perfectly to be natural. He had been right. However, that did not mean that Ferdinand’s joy was false in any way.

“ Hubert! I’m simply touched to the core, showing your concern so openly. Your sweet hearted manner really is a hidden treasure. I entirely though Lady Edelgard had changed her appearance to humor your new hobby.” 

“Ah yes. My master project indeed. It will be my legacy.” Hubert said, voice laced with a sarcasm he knew Ferdinand would recognize.

“Among other things.” Ferdinand answered fondly, because his noble heart still had to respond earnestly every now and then. 

Their gazes finally met and the two men simply smiled at each other for a moment, content with their shared company. Hubert cleared his throat after the silence, an unattractive noise cutting through the quiet.

“ You’ve successfully derailed the conversation for a moment, but my point still stands. It’s impractical and foolish of you to leave your hair loose while fighting.”

“ Hubert, I wear a cape. That cannot possibly be considered better or worse than my hair.”

“The cloth of a cape can be removed with far more haste than the fibres attached to your head.”

There came a long sigh from the knight sitting opposite him, yet the glint of amusement remained in his kind eyes.

“ Well then? What do you suggest I do? Are your hairstyling skills for hire by any chance? If you make me look half as lovely as the Lady I will owe you a great debt indeed.”

“ Don’t be ridiculous. Such a task is an impossibility.” Hubert scoffed at the thought, taking a sip of his now lukewarm beverage. His attention briefly elsewhere, he failed to notice the disappointed look on his friends face. Yet, to Hubert, comparing the two didn’t make sense. Not only was Edelgard cool color where Ferdinand was warm, but Edelgards feminine and powerful small frame was impossible to put next to the Cavaliers masculine and slender form. They simply did not compare. Their beauties were as different as crystal and bronze.

There was a short pause that didn’t quite adhere to the standard between them. Somehow a light tension had flown in like a daring bird seeking food from an ill tempered farmers table.

“ Perhaps I will ask Petra to braid my hair in the Brigidian style. We would make a fetching pair with matching ponytails, wouldn’t you agree?” 

Hubert laughs along but the phrasing twists uncomfortably in his gut. A pair.

“ Petra has better things to concern herself with than your vanity. Unlike some of us here, she has her own kingdom to rule in due time. I would prefer for her education to go interrupted by silly indulgences… “Fetching” as the two of you might end up looking.”

“ Well then, who would you suggest take on the momentous task of styling my long locks? I do take quite good care of them now you know, and while I trust our companions with my life I don’t entirely trust their taste in style. I fear dearly for my poor scalp if we were to have Caspar tend to my hair. And Linhardt might entirely give up and decide on cutting it for me, if only for his own convenience. “

Ferdinand perfect teeth were on full display as he grinned, taking another sip of his tea. There was of course always the possibility that Petra could do the prime ministers hair. She would probably find it fun to style someone in her image, adorning them in braids similar to her own. Dorothea would probably find equal enjoyment in twisting the orange into something elaborate and fashionable. There probably would be no complain from any of the black eagles if Ferdinand asked for help, the magnetism of the man making it hard to say no. 

Yet.

Yet Huberts treacherous self would counter all the reasons someone else could tend to Ferdinand quite logically, leaving himself the only rational option. Reason being the key factor he should do it himself, of course. There was no desire at all present to remove his gloves and run his hands through the sunset silk. No drive whatsoever, to bring the tangerine waterfall to his nose to see if it really smelled like summer. Absolutely no temptation at all. Logic, and logic alone made Hubert speak. 

“ Well if you truly have come to your senses and allowed me to persuade your stubborn mind into a more practical style to wear during battle, I suppose I’ll see the task through. So you won't bother someone else, or end up with anything needlessly elaborate.”

His voice held his usual disinterest in the topic, but his eyes did not stray from his friends face. And he was glad for it, as the color that stained the high cheekbones were a shade to deep to just be his usual rouge. Ferdinand blinked a couple of times, teacup stopped midway between plate and lips. 

“ Really?”

There was nothing but surprise to the single word that seemed to escape the usually so composed man. He quite reminded Hubert of a doe he’d seen during a hunt once, stunned by a paralyzing surprise.

“No Ferdinand, I needesly offered to do it simply to make fun, after making solid points as to why it would be a good idea.”

The shade on the knights cheeks went from a pink carnation to a scarlet rose. 

“Well, you can’t fault me for having to ask if you were serious, the only other person you’ve ever styled hair for is Lady Edelgard and I didn’t want to assume that I was- I mean, I didn’t , that is to say - I weren’t sure if you did that… for anyone else. ”

Hubert had not heard the noble fumble with his phrasing since their academy days when Lorenz had offered to take him to prom through a performance of quite horrendous and public poetry. It had been a hilarious encounter, leading to some intense gossip among the students, and Hubert had at the time entirely ignored the ridiculous pair. (No matter what Edlegards claims he had not been caught planning to poison the Gloucester whelp.)

It was the ravens turn to blink, trying to escape the brief confusion at his friends sudden shyness. For a moment he fought the urge to ask what he meant, if it were too intimate a suggestion for the two of them. If the offer it made him uncomfortable. If he thought their bond was any weaker than that of his and Edelgards when it came to such a trivial task. If there was any petty jealousy there, if Ferdinand wished he were receiving the same treatment on a regular basis. 

He didn’t manage to voice any of his indulgent speculations, as Ferdinand stood up from his seat in a sudden rush, looking everywhere but at Hubert. It wasn’t something he particularly enjoyed. It was a rare thing for Hubert to want anyone to see him, he was so used to being a shadow. He rarely let himself want any attention, but the simple fact was that he couldn't stand Ferdinand avoiding looking at him. It had taken them so long to see eye to eye.

Before the frantic figure could politely make an excuse to flee politely, Hubert reached out and boldly grabbed the escapees wrist. There was a sharp inhalation of air, and the mage couldn't help but feel somewhat embarrassed himself, at how melodramatic it all was. 

“ Ferdinand. No need to be embarrassed. I haven’t offered nor have I been asked to tend to anyone else's hair. If you’re worried it might be deemed improper, I can promise I will wear my gloves at all times. I simply do not want you to get hurt in a stupid manner such as getting your princely mane getting caught in a twig while you prance around on your glorified pony. Now, will you indulge me or no? you may decline if you wish.”

If he held his breath as he awaited his answer, no one needed to know.

“ … You know you needn’t be so cruel towards the Lady Justicia.”

“ I wouldn’t be if you’d named her something less ridiculous.“

Hubert softened his grip, suddenly aware of how tightly his hold was on the Lancer’s wrist. His hands were larger, less calloused with longer fingers. Ferdinand's hands were powerful, perfectly square and symmetrical. 

“ I don’t see how I can deny your indulgence when you ask for so little Hubert. If it brings you any reassurance I won’t refuse. Apologies for my overreaction. And for my assumptions.”

Something softened between them as their eyes meet, and birds erratically filled their new silence. The space between them seemed to vibrate with an anticipation alien to them both. A faint warmth seemed to spread across Huberts own cheeks as Ferdinand held his gaze with an emotion rarely on display so openly between them. It took him awhile to realize he was still holding onto the nobleman's wrist, thumb dangerously close to the bare skin above the short glove. He released his hold gently and Ferdinand chuckled once more. Hubert cleared his throat, and picked up his way laid report.

“ Very good then. Let’s discuss further over dinner.”

Ferdinand sat back down with all his practice graced returned full force, and once more reached out for his now cold tea. His voice carried a fragile, hopeful emotion that knocked Huberts air out of his lungs. 

“ Yes… Let’s do that.”

**Author's Note:**

> The second part will feature a lot more amused Black Eagles watching two emotionally repressed grown men dance around each other. Enjoy!


End file.
